After reading through questions on a hearing loss quiz from an article in U.S. News, my strange sense of humour kicked in and I had to comment on some of the questions. Yes, hearing loss is a serious subject and I highly advocate (as you know) the use of hearing protection. However, in a world so full of serious stuff, let’s take a break and have a bit of a laugh! Well, I hope you do, anyway!

If you take the hearing loss quiz and answer yes to more than three questions, you may have some amount of hearing loss. I was thinking, though, that many of the questions could have another reason or answer. Here’s my take.

Question 1: Do you have problems hearing over the telephone? What if it’s a bill collector, jilted lover or your mother-in-law? “Sorry, you’re breaking up… I’ll have to ring you later!”

Question 2: Do you have trouble following the conversation when two or more people are talking at the same time? Have you been to one of my family reunions? Nobody can understand anything my aunts and Mum are trying to say at the same time!

Question 3: Do people complain that you turn the TV volume up too high? Then be more quiet in the other room when a Russell Crowe movie is playing!!

Question 4: Do you have to strain to understand conversations? Only during political conversations when politicians are speaking out of both sides of their mouths!

Question 5: Do you have trouble hearing in a noisy background? No, my iPod sounds just fine with my custom earphones.

Question 6: Do you find yourself asking people to repeat themselves? Yes, but only my son. “So, tell me again, why did you flush your sister’s pet fish down the loo?”

Question 7: Do many people you talk to seem to mumble (or not speak clearly)? Only my pre-teen daughter and her friends who speak in text. OMGYG2BK! (translation: Oh my God, You’ve got to be kidding!)

Question 8: Do you misunderstand what others are saying and respond inappropriately? I always understand, whether or not my response is inappropriate is a subjective matter.

Question 9: Do you have trouble understanding the speech of women and children? Women, no. Children, refer to questions 6 & 7.

Question 10: Do people get annoyed because you misunderstand what they say? Perhaps the person didn’t understand what he or she said and I understood perfectly.

Seriously, if you answered yes more than three of the questions, you should consider seeing your physician. If not, continue to protect your hearing!

Cheers!

Meghan